“The Devil had already put into the heart of Judas, the son of Simon Iscariot, the thought of betraying Jesus.” -- John 13:2
I checked my cellphone, it was already 11:00pm. In an hour, a new year will come. My mind started going over my list of desired New Year’s resolutions. You see, my idea of a New Year celebration is to eat with my family and then later curl into a quiet corner to reflect on the past year, and look into the new year until early dawn.
Then the glasses of beer started coming in courtesy of my brother-in-law, the father of Jay-Jay. Since I’m not really a big fan of beer I began concocting polite ways to decline the offer. But then it occurred to me, this was my opportunity to practice what I preached – value relationships. I told myself that I would drink not because I craved for a cold beer (I didn't), but to celebrate the arrival of my brother-in-law and his family. Besides they only visit once a year; a few glasses of beer shouldn't be a big deal.
Unfortunately, I misjudged my system and had more beer than it can handle, so sheepishly I announced my retreat, and staggered to my home. As the firecrackers detonated, blew and sparkled in the evening sky by midnight, I was happily snoring into dreamland – good night to curling into a quiet nook to reflect and write.
Every start of the year, many of us are compelled to make a New Year’s resolution because of the idea of a fresh start. It’s like a new empty book is handed to us to write anew our life story, to correct the past year’s mitakes. In truth, many of us are eager to write not only a good story, but a great story about us. And this is perfectly normal.
So we merrily skip and jump our way into the new year full of excitement. However, before we get disillusioned we should not forget that every great story requires great effort and great sacrifices. Sooner or later, in our journey we will hit a brick wall. “Why can’t it be easy,” a few hisses.
God plant good dreams in our heart. However, He also allows thick brick walls along our way. This is not to stop us but to force us to change ourselves. Because only a new us, a great us, can pass through the thick wall and play the great story that you and I wanted to write for ourselves. And we pass through not by fighting it, but by adapting to it – changing our thinking, habit, and attitude. The ‘you’ and ‘I’ now are not qualified, at least not yet.
So if the brick wall is my (and your) friend, why I failed to play out all my previous resolutions? The brick wall was not the problem as you may already know now; the problem was doubt and fear. While God plants good thoughts in our heart, Satan does the opposite – talk to poor Judas. Satan twisted the way we look at the brick wall, as an insurmountable, three-eyed, hairy giant monster to be avoided and feared rather than as the forging hand of God that will change us for the better, and therefore should be welcomed.
Looking back at my New Year’s Eve, I really did not just drink beer, I sipped a potion of change that celebrates frienship and connection with my brothers-in-law. Yes, it was a different New Year for me, but a new me begs for a new and a better story….so does your story for 2011, my friend.
PS: I did finish writing my New Year's resolution a couple of days after, and I now carry it with me everyday.